Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(979): View more from Texas

so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.

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(917): View more from New York City

was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?

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(870): View more from Arkansas

Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?

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(812): View more from Indiana

well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops

(847): View more from Illinois

You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."

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(571): View more from Virginia

If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.

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