Already got asked if we're dating
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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