I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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