My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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