Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Pants are for mortals
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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