Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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