Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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