love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
