my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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