I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
