i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
