Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
there's paper in my vomit.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize