saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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