420 ftw
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
