Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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