? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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