I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
