carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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