does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
