I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
God, I missed his penis.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
