Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck

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(985): View more from Louisiana

He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"

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(847): View more from Illinois

Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"

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(740): View more from Ohio

He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"

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(509): View more from Washington

Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...

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(360): View more from Washington

Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening

(214): View more from Texas

YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER

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(254): View more from Texas

I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?

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