ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
