That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
