Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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