This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
