How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
