i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
