well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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