i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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