plz talk dirty to me
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
