It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
