TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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