Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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