if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
