I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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