You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
