I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Still dying that you shit outside
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
