STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
