i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Randomize
