You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Randomize
