Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize
