you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
