My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
you would pick up someone in the library
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
