Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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