she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
