he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
