I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
