i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
