She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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