I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize