all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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