i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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